Active listening everybody loves raymond

Laila Alrazouqi

HCOM 100

Active Listening

Listening is one of the most important skills in communication. O’HAIR, WIEMANN, MULLIN & TEVEN (2011) found “listening is the process of recognizing, understanding, accurately interpreting, and responding effectively the messages you hear” (p.158). Listening is more than just hearing someone talks and their voice. Listening includes five processes, selecting, attending, understanding, remembering, and responding. In order for someone to become a better listener they have to practice active listening. Use “according to…(name) bedal kila flan alflany found… naw3ay” O’HAIR, WIEMANN, MULLIN mindful and to make a conscious effort to understand the message being sent rather than only hear, TEVEN (2011) found “Active listening involves being an active participant in making choices about selecting, attending, and so on” (p. 160). Active listening is to be more aware and sensible of the words you are hearing and to understand the whole message being sent. Active listening may also include asking questions to encourage the speaker to elaborate on his or her beliefs or feelings (WEGER 14). in the series Everybody Loves Raymond one of the episodes was about active listening.

Ally, Ray’s and Debra’s daughter, is being very stubborn and is disobeying to her parents (la tistakhdemen nafs kalmat el um wayed). The parents decided to take a parenting class in order to learn some tips and techniques on how to control their daughter (Ally) and how to deal with her. During the class, the teacher asked if someone has a question and Debra told her about her daughter’s problem, Debra said “We have a six years old daughter and she is a great kid, but she have been trouble listening and she have been very stubborn likely.” The teacher told them to use active listening. She stated, “Active listening is encouraging the child to express herself verbally without influencing her with your own thoughts and opinion.” The teacher then asked Ray to perform an example with her in order to illustrate what she meant by active listening. The teacher was playing Ally’s role and Ray is playing himself. She asked Ray to try to use active listening with her in order to convince her to go to her grandmother birthday party. Unfortunately, Ray failed and was not able to do it with the teacher.

One day Ray tried the active listening with his neighbors Marie and Frank while they were fighting together, and it worked. He was happy that he succeeded. Ray went back to his home and he saw that his wife Debra was yelling at her daughter Ally because she broke the toy, which was a giraffe and her little brother was crying because of what Ally did. Ray interfered the conversation between Debra and Ally and asked his wife to use active listening. Debra looked disappointed and told him that it does not work. He insists that she has to try using it because he just used it with his neighbors and it worked. Debra tried her best to use active listening with her daughter Ally but she did not succeed.

Debra asked Ally if she is angry and Ally told her that she is. Debra started to judge her daughter here when Ray interfered and said “Judgmental” which means be aware to judge her, because judging is not considered as active listening. Debra tried harder but she could not do it. Ray stopped Debra and started the conversation with Ally. He asked her if she is angry because the toy belongs the her and they gave it to her brothers Michael and Jiffy she agreed and she told them that she hate Michael and Jiffy. Ally was jealous from her siblings because they get everything. Ray asked Ally if she thinks that her mother and father pay more attention to her siblings. The father continues his active listening with Ally and asked her if she is upset because they gave her siblings her old giraffe and Ally told him that it still belongs to her. Debra was annoyed and told Ray that Ally does not play with the giraffe lately. In order not to destroy everything, Ray told Debra that it does not matter if she still plays with it or not because it is a property of Ally and she is mad because they gave it to Michael without her permission. Ally agreed with her father. Ray tried to make Ally satisfied and told her that they made a mistake. Ally feelt better after her conversation with her father, and she asked for the giraffe in order to fix it for her brother.

The parents were surprised that the active listening went well with their daughter who has been very stubborn lately. People should know how to use active listening carefully. The listener should respond to the speaker in a way that inspire him and makes him continue speaking, in this way the speaker will be inspired and the listener will get the information they need.

Everybody Loves Raymond is an American television sitcom starring Ray Romano, Patricia Heaton, Doris Roberts, Peter Boyle, and Brad Garrett. It originally ran on CBS from September 13, 1996 to May 16, 2005. Phillip Rosenthal created it. Each episode has almost a different writer and director. For the episode I chose which was about “Father Knows Least” it was written by Lew Schneider and created by Michael Lessac on September 29th. 1997.