Write about one of your self defeating behavior patterns

Everyone gets off course at times, but only those who are selfaware can make a course correction to improve their lives. 1. Write about a time when you were off course and took effective actions to get back on course. Examples include ending an unhealthy relationship, entering college years after high school, changing careers, stopping an addiction, choosing to be more assertive, or changing a negative belief or bias you held about yourself, other people, or the world. Dive deep in your journal entry by asking and answering questions such as the following: • In what area of my life was I off course? • What choices had I made to get off course? • What changes did I make to get back on course? • What challenges did I face while making this change? • What personal strengths helped me make this change? • What benefits did I experience as a result of my change? If I hadn’t made this change, what would my life be like today? 2. Write about an area of your life in which you are off course today. If you need help in identifying an area, review your desired outcomes and experiences from Journal Entry 8 and your goals and dreams from Journal Entry 9. Explain which area of your life is furthest from the way you would like it to be. What choices have you made that got you off course? What will be the effect on your life if you continue to stay off course? The fact that you’ve made positive changes in the past is a good reminder that you have the personal strengths to make similar changes whenever you wish. All you need is the awareness that you’re off course and the motivation to make new choices. Student story 1-Sarah was aware that her choices were not the best. She states that she was doing things she knew she shouldn’t be doing. Think of a time when you did something you knew you shouldn’t do. Why did you do it? How did you feel after you did it? Were there any consequences related to your behavior? 2. Sometimes you can consciously avoid a bad choice by making another choice preemptively. For example, if you know a certain friend will want you to go out and party, you might make a healthy plan with another friend first. Or, if you know that you’ll be tempted to purchase food that’s bad for you at a certain store, you might choose to take a different route home. It’s important to develop the ability to say “no” in your life, but it’s also helpful to think critically about the temptations you face each day. What kind of preemptive choices could you make in your own life? How could you avoid or say “no” to the negative experiences that limit your success? In this activity, you will explore self-defeating patterns in your life that may reveal unconscious scripts. You’re about to embark on an exciting journey into your inner world! There you can discover— and later revise—the invisible forces that have gotten you off course from your goals and dreams. 1. Write about one of your self-defeating behavior patterns. Choose a behavior pattern that you checked on the list or identify a self-defeating behavior that isn’t on the list but that you do often. Remember, a behavior is something someone else can see you do. Develop your journal paragraphs by anticipating questions that someone reading it might have about this behavior pattern. (Even you might have questions when you read your journal 10 years from now.) For example, • • • • • What exactly is your self-defeating behavior pattern? What are some specific examples of when you did this behavior? What may have caused this habit? What undesirable effects has it had on your life? How would your life be improved if you changed it? One student began by writing, “One of my self-defeating behaviour patterns is that I seldom do my best work on college assignments. For example, in my biology lab. . . .” 2. Repeat Step 1 for one of your self-defeating thought patterns or for one of your self-defeating emotional patterns. Once again, choose a pattern that you checked on the list or identify a habit that isn’t on the list but that you often think or feel. You might begin, One of my self-defeating thought patterns is that I often wonder if I am smart enough to be successful in college. I especially think this during exams. For example, last Thursday I . . . Or . . . One of my self-defeating emotional patterns is that I often feel frustrated. For example. . . . Student story 1. Imagine that James Floriolli were one of your classmates. Think of at least two “On Course” concepts not discussed in this essay that could help James reach his dream job. Now, imagine having a conversation with James in which you explain in detail how he can apply these two “On Course” concepts in his life. What advice would you give him? Be as specific as possible in your response. 2. James struggles to follow through when he encounters setbacks. Sometimes we mistake temporary setbacks as personal failure. Have you ever stopped trying to succeed at something because you encountered a setback? What if you tried again? What would you do and how might you learn from your first attempt? Many famously successful people struggled early. If you have struggled in this way, describe the experience and discuss how you might improve or try again.