Here the infinitive (or to + verb) verb form should be used to parallel other similar verb forms in the series.
Very often, editing errors are easier for others to see than for you to detect in your own writing, so it is a good idea to ask a classmate, roommate, or friend to edit your work in addition to the work you have done. It is not necessary to have immediate answers while editing, but it is important to raise questions and to double-check for accuracy. Chapter 24 (pp. 635–46) provides sound advice and solutions for the editing problems that trouble students most. For more guidance with these and other editing concerns, refer to a grammar handbook, make an appointment with a writing center tutor, or ask your instructor for advice.
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Proofreading Do not assume that because you used a spell-check or grammar-check function you’ve found and corrected every spelling and grammatical error. In fact, such checkers often allow incorrect or misspelled words to pass while flagging correct grammatical constructions as incorrect. Although spell-checkers and grammar-checkers are a good first line of defense against certain types of errors, there is no replacement for a human proofreader — you.
One way to proofread is to print out your essay and carefully proofread it manually. Distancing yourself from the screen and reading with a pen or pencil in hand makes it easier to avoid simply skimming the words you’ve written. Check to make sure you do not use your where you intend you’re, its where you mean it’s, or to where you want too. Spell-checkers often do not catch these types of errors. If you know you are prone to certain mistakes, go through your essay looking for those particular errors.
Be sure to refer to the Questions for Editing and Proofreading Essays box in this section. Check to be certain you have followed your instructor’s formatting guidelines. Above all, give your essay one final read-through before submitting it to your instructor.
Questions for Editing and Proofreading Essays
1. Have I checked my essay for common grammatical or style errors that I am prone to make?
2. Have I corrected my editing errors with the help of my handbook?
3. Have I printed a hard copy of my essay for proofreading?
4. Have I misspelled or incorrectly typed any words? Has my spell-checker inadvertently approved commonly confused words such as its and it’s or their, there, and they’re?
5. Have I checked my essay for errors I make often?
6. Do all my edits and corrections appear in my hard copy?
7. Have I formatted my essay according to my instructor’s directions?
8. Have I given the hard copy of my final draft a thorough review before turning it in?
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Writing an Expository Essay: A Student Essay in Progress While he was a student in a writing class at the University of Vermont, Jeffrey Olesky was asked to write an essay on any topic using a suitable method of development. After making a brief list of the subjects that interested him, he chose to write about golf. Golf had been a part of Olesky’s life since he was a youngster, so he figured he would have enough material for an essay.
First, he needed to focus on a specific topic within the broad subject area of golf. Having considered a number of aspects of the game — how it’s played, its rise in popularity, the controversies over the exclusion of women and minorities from private clubs — he kept coming back to how much golf meant to him. Focusing on his love of golf, he then established his tentative thesis.
Tentative Thesis
Golf has taught me a lot.
Olesky needed to develop a number of examples to support his thesis, so he brainstormed for ideas, examples, and anecdotes — anything that came to mind to help him develop his essay. These are his notes:
Brainstorming Notes Golf is my life — I can’t imagine being who I am without it.
I love to be out on the course ear ly in the morning.
It ’s been embarrassing and stressful sometimes.
There’s so much to know and remember about the game, even before you try to hit the ball.
The story about what my father taught me — felt badly and needed to apologize.
“You know better than that, Jeffrey.”
I have pictures of me on the greens with a cut-down golf putter.
All kinds of character building goes on.
It ’s all about rules and playing fair ly.
Wanted to be like my father.
The frustration is awesome, but you can learn to deal with it.
Golf is methodical.
I use golf to c lear my head.
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Golf teaches life ’s lessons.
Golf teaches you manners, to be respectful of others.
Golf teaches you to abide by the rules.
Golf is an internal tool.
When he thought that he had gathered enough information, he began to consider an organizational plan, a way to present his information in a logical manner. He realized that the character-building benefits of golf that he included in his brainstorming notes clustered around some key subtopics. He decided to do some clustering, drawing circles that included his ideas about golf: the physical and mental demands of the game, the social values and ‐ morals it teaches, and the reflective benefits of golf. He then sorted out his related ideas and examples and added them, mapping their relationships in this diagram.
Before beginning to write the first draft of his essay, Olesky thought it would be a good idea to list in an informal outline the major points he wanted to make. Here is his informal outline:
Informal Outline 1. Brief introductory paragraph announcing the topic
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2. An expansion of the introductory paragraph and the thesis statement: Golf has taught me a
lot
3. A discussion of how, above all, golf teaches one to control one’s emotions
4. A discussion of how much one needs to know and remember to play golf well
5. The social values that golf teaches
6. A multiparagraph example il lustrating a valuable lesson taught through golf
7. Golf provides an opportunity to reflect
8. Reflection, in turn, leads to a deeper appreciation of nature
With his outline before him, Olesky felt ready to try a rough draft of his essay. He wrote quickly, keeping his organizational plan in mind but striving to keep the writing going and get his thoughts down on paper. He knew that once he had a draft, he could determine how to improve it. Olesky wrote some fairly solid paragraphs, but he sensed that they were on different aspects of his topic and that the logical order of the points he was making was not quite right. He needed a stronger organizational plan, some way to present his information that was not random but rather showed a logical progression.
Reviewing his outline, Olesky could see that there was a natural progression from the physical lessons of the sport to the social and moral lessons to the psychological, emotional, and even spiritual benefits that one could derive. He decided therefore to move item 3 in his original organization and make it item 6 in the revision. Here is his reordered outline:
Reordered Outline 1. Brief introductory paragraph announcing the topic
2. An expansion of the introductory paragraph and the thesis statement: Golf has taught me a
lot
3. A discussion of how much one needs to know and remember to play golf well
4. The social values that golf teaches
5. A multiparagraph example il lustrating a valuable lesson taught through golf
6. A discussion of how, above all, golf teaches one to control one’s emotions
7. Golf provides an opportunity to reflect
8. Reflection, in turn, leads to a deeper appreciation of nature
Olesky was satisfied that his essay now had a natural and logical organization: it moved from matters of lesser to greater importance to him personally. However, he now needed to revise his thesis to suit the argument he had established. He wanted his revised thesis to be focused and specific and to include the idea that the lessons and values golf has taught him could not have been learned as easily in other ways. Here is his revised thesis statement:
Revised Thesis Statement
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In its simplicity, golf has taught me many lessons and values that other people have trouble
learning elsewhere.
After revising the organization, he was now ready to edit his essay and to correct those smaller but equally important errors in word choice, wordiness, punctuation, and mechanics. He had put aside these errors to make sure his essay had the appropriate content. Now he needed to make sure it was grammatically correct. Here are several sample paragraphs showing the editing Olesky did on his essay:
Edited Paragraphs
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In addition to editing his revised paper, Olesky reexamined his title, “Character Builder.” He considered a half dozen alternatives and finally settled on the use of “Golf” as a main title because it was such a key word for his topic and thesis; he used “A Character Builder” as his subtitle. He also thought about his conclusion, wondering whether it was forceful enough.
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After giving it considerable thought and seeking the advice of his classmates, Olesky decided to end with the low-key but meaningful final paragraphs he generated in his original draft. Here is the final version of his essay:
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