This is pr 11th edition pdf

Writing Improvement

Instructions: The best way to complete these exercises online is to download the file and save it as an .rtf document. Type your changes directly into the worksheet, directly under each sentence and preferably in a color other than black.. Re-save your document, and then upload it through the Blackboard link.

Flabby Expressions. Revise the following sentences to eliminate "flabby phrases," wordy prepositional phrases, outdated expressions, and long lead-ins.

16. We are sending a revised proposal at this point in time due to the fact that building costs have jumped at a considerable rate.

17. In the normal course of events, we would seek additional funding; however, in view of the fact that rates have increased, we cannot.

18. Inasmuch as our web advertising income is increasing in a gradual manner, we might seek a loan in the amount of $50,000.

Long Lead-Ins. Revise these sentences to eliminate long lead-in phrases.

21. This is an announcement to tell you that all computer passwords must be changed every six months for security purposes.

22. We are sending this memo to notify everyone who wants to apply for telecommuting may submit an application immediately.

23. I am writing this letter to inform you that your new account executive is Edward Ho.

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There is/are and It is/was fillers.. Revise the following sentences to eliminate fillers (such as "there is" and "it is").

26. There is a password checker that is now available that can automatically evaluate the strength of your password.

27. It is careless or uninformed individuals who are the most vulnerable to computer hackers.

28. There are computers in internet cafes, at conferences, and in airport lounges that should be considered unsafe for any personal use.

Redundancies. Revise the following sentences to eliminate redundancies.

31. Because his laptop was small in size, he could carry it everywhere.

32. A basic fundamental of computer safety is to avoid storing your password on a file in your computer because criminals will look there first.

33. The manager repeated again his warning that we must use strong passwords.

Empty Words. Revise the following sentences to eliminate empty words.

36. Are you aware of the fact that social media can drive brand awareness and customer loyalty?

37. Except for the instance of MySpace, social networking sites are booming.

38. If you seek to build an online community that will support your customers, social media services can help.